TV: Lottery 'Cars & Cash ad

#I'm a road-runner hunny...#

Yeah, and I wish you'd go for a long run off a short pier - I'm soooo bored with this ad now.

TV: X-Factor

I never thought I'd say this but I'm genuinely warming to Louis Walsh this year. Maybe it's because Simon Cowell has become even more of an irritating jerk. Having said that, I still wouldn't want Louis managing my band.

TV: 8 out of Ten Cats

Brian Belo just admitted to "shitting himself" on a train and posting the event on Twitter to get advice on what he should do about it!

LOL.

If there was a dictionary definition of 'Loveable Baffoon' Brian would be it.

TV: Eastenders

I have just seen one of the best episodes of Eastenders ever! Not just because of the high drama... but because of the way Peggy spoke her lines at the end of the show, "Let it burn... Let it burn..." It was absolutely hilarious. Where did that voice come from - under her wig????? Has Peggy been body-snatched by an alien???? Surely this is the final twist that sees Peggy leave the show, not in a cab, but in a space ship - Gawd Bless e'r.

TV: My Family's Crazy Gap Year

Or what should be more aptly titled, 'My Crazy Family's Gap Year.'

Can anyone tell me what posessed the mother of this middle-class family to drag her family to

a country with one of the highest rates of potentially fatal diseases, without immunisation!?!?

Whether I got to see The Dalai Lama or not, I wouldn't like to rely on a Herbal Tinture to treat me for a case of Malaria - would you?

Absolute bonkers.

Anyway, I changed channel when I saw the native family pulling the innards out of a freshly killed goat. Which was nice...

FOOD & DRINK: Champagne

Gassy, over-rated, bad breath juice. I hate it.

TV: Latest Durex TV spot

I've never been a fan of 'nice ads', but this one definitely brought a wry smile to my face.

However, my only question is; why was it on at midday? Are they trying to catch the Jeremy Kyle gang just before they slip off for some unprotected sex and a can of Tennents Super? :)

KIDS TV: Top ten worst shows (that I'm regularly forced to watch!).

1. Show me Show me

Really old TV presenters singing really naff kid's songs

2. Big cook little cook

The food they make is insulting even for a 2 year old.

3. Number jacks

What is the concept behind this programme???

4. Tommy Zoom

Stock footage and cartoon, cut 'n' shut together. Why is there only one baddie?

5. Mighty Mites

The female presenter needs shooting.

6. Waybaloo

Utter gibberish

7. Balamory

Just poor

8. Nina and the nuerons

What exactly is the science behind this talentless womans experiments?

9. Tinga Tales

The Token Multi-cultural kids programme.

10. Big Barn Farm

The second job of the annoying voice-over man from 'Come Die with me'.

The theme tune sounds like it's been made by the local radio station.